Reflections of a fat man…..
Hello. My name is Pono and I want to be a skinnyaire. Have you ever felt so uncomfortable in your skin that it feels like everyone you come across is thin, beautiful, and happier than they’ve ever been? I have. In fact, going to a gym is one of the worst experiences I can have. Why, you ask? Because everyone you work out next to is where you want to be right now. You are the fat person in the gym or on the road walking or in the store shopping. It feels like a million eyes are on you, probably scheming against your “fatness” and coming up with legitimate reasons I don’t belong in the gym with them starting with the fact that I am fat! Hold the press! Isn’t that bassackwards thinking? The chubby, pleasantly plump, over-indulgent, hefty, husky, beefy, voluptuous, and horizontally challenged folks belong in the gym or on the road or in their home doing cardio with Bob Harper just as much as the muscular, toned, beautiful people have a right to. In fact, a little known fact……lots of those people weren’t always like that. Many of them used to be us. I even feel this way around my wife at times. She is this slender, attractive woman and I feel like an old, awkward ox standing next to her. I have days where I have a hard time approaching people I am so self-conscious. Who would have thought being overweight could be so debilitating for some of us? I never thought…..until now.
Battle of our Lives
We are all in this together. I am inviting you into my personal, private life of emotions and thought
processes so you can better understand a different perspective of the weightier side of humanity. The reality that underneath this shell of layered lipids, we find the core of human life, a soul. How many times have I passed judgement on a book’s cover only to be gravely mistaken as to the worth that lay within the pages of that literary wonder? No matter if it be of a different color or smell or even religion, how many times have I been guilty, myself, of this heinous act of falsely judging a person? I consider myself very accepting of all people and have a lot of love for people in general. Yet, categorizing ourselves comes so naturally it sneaks its way into our psyche with such subtlety, it literally clouds our judgement of right and wrong with imperceptible tiny deviations in our thinking patterns making the unacceptable acceptable. This is the battle we are waging. I must first learn to love myself and see myself with respect if this is going to work. Many times we live and treat our bodies the way we view ourselves….unworthy of dignity and refinement. Wherever these thoughts have come from, it is time to change our mind and CHOOSE to be happy and CHOOSE to do what is right and CHOOSE to treat ourselves with a little respect.
I, Pono, give myself permission…….
I choose today to be better at eating a better range of food that will aid me in achieving my weight-loss goal. I choose to workout daily, and even twice daily or as many times as it presents itself to take advantage of the opportunities. I choose to have more positive self-talk sessions with myself and let me know I am worth it. If any of you read this post and agree or are struggling with the same things, drop me a line. I choose to be even better than before from here on out.
My goal in one year!